{"id":8389,"date":"2012-05-29T17:37:42","date_gmt":"2012-05-29T17:37:42","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.musicademy.com\/?p=8389"},"modified":"2019-07-31T09:17:28","modified_gmt":"2019-07-31T09:17:28","slug":"how-to-offer-artists-criticism-without-being-a-jerk","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.musicademy.com\/blog\/how-to-offer-artists-criticism-without-being-a-jerk\/","title":{"rendered":"How to Offer Artists Criticism Without Being a Jerk"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Artists (\u201cArtists\u201d applies to musicians, singers, painters, graphic designers, actors, dancers, etc) in the church receive a tremendous amount of criticism. Musicians especially seem to have a never-ending stream of complainers. I\u2019ve heard everything from \u201cthe music was too loud,\u201d \u201cdon\u2019t use that song again \u2013 I didn\u2019t like it,\u201d and, one of my personal favorites \u201cdid you know you messed up on that one part?\u201d (As if I was not aware that a train wreck had occurred).<\/p>\n<p>I think there are two kinds of people out there when it comes to criticism. <strong>First, there are those who want to point out something that was less than perfect.<\/strong> Whether it\u2019s a song choice they didn\u2019t like or something that was just wrong, they can\u2019t wait to let you know. Most of the time, it seems these people just want to bring you down a peg. <strong>Second, there are those who genuinely want to help make things better by offering constructive criticism.<\/strong> These people are on your side and support what you\u2019re doing. They noticed something that could be better and they want to help you. <strong>This post is written to the second group of people<\/strong>. (Let\u2019s face it, the first group doesn\u2019t really care if there\u2019s a better way or not.) I want to help the second group understand <strong>how to offer constructive criticism without being a jerk.<!--more--><\/strong><\/p>\n<p>First off, two important things to understand about artists:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li><strong>Their art is an extension of themselves. <\/strong>For most artists, they can spend hours, days \u2013 even weeks \u2013 crafting their art. They pour every ounce of their being into making this art what it is. To criticize or even imply that it could be better in any way can be devastating to them. For me, this used to happen (OK it still does, just not as often) with something as simple as the setlist for Sunday mornings. I would spend hours combing through lyrics and songs to find ones that matched perfectly with the theme. Then I\u2019d carefully plan out the order of the service so that it flowed nicely. Then someone would tell me they hated one of those songs or they didn\u2019t like the selections and it would be like a kick in the teeth. Sure, it was never meant that way but when it\u2019s that much a part of you, it\u2019s hard for it not to be taken that way.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Great art is our holy grail.<\/strong> It\u2019s what we\u2019re all hoping to achieve. We\u2019re big dreamers and it\u2019s hard even for us to live up to our own dreams. The problem is that we want so bad for our art to be great that <strong>we live in constant fear that we\u2019re not going to create great art.<\/strong> The thing we\u2019re most afraid of is not that we\u2019re going to create bad art but that our art will be mediocre. <strong>We\u2019d rather create no art than mediocre art.<\/strong><\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p>When you feel the urge to offer criticism, follow these steps to help from coming off as the wrong kind of person.<\/p>\n<ol>\n<li><strong>Pray.<\/strong> First pray about it. Make sure it\u2019s not just a matter of personal taste.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Check your motives.<\/strong> Do I want to point out this person\u2019s flaws and bring them down a notch? Or do I genuinely want to help them and see them succeed?<\/li>\n<li><strong>Ask the important question: <\/strong>Am I the right person to offer this criticism? What is my relationship with the person? Are they apt to listen to me or should it come from someone else? If so, who?<\/li>\n<li><strong>Find the right time.<\/strong> When I\u2019m getting ready to walk on stage Sunday morning, don\u2019t tell me that you don\u2019t like the opening song. When that happens (<strong>yes, it really has happened<\/strong>) it derails my mind making it hard to focus on worship and it zaps all the energy clean out of me.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Don\u2019t make it personal. <\/strong>This actually goes both ways. Please don\u2019t make it personal to me, the one being criticized. <em>eg. <\/em>If the song isn\u2019t your favorite, don\u2019t call me stupid for picking it. Likewise, don\u2019t take it personally if it doesn\u2019t change. (When it happens on a Sunday morning, it\u2019s really too late to change it anyway. The reason I\u2019m keeping it is because it\u2019s too late, not because I don\u2019t like you!)<\/li>\n<li><strong>Remember that even constructive criticism is still criticism.<\/strong> No matter how nice you try to put it, you\u2019re still criticizing. Don\u2019t expect to be thanked and praised right away for offering up your criticism, no matter how much sugar you pour on it. It <em>might <\/em>happen, but it also might not.<\/li>\n<li><strong>Let it go.<\/strong> Once you\u2019ve offered up your thoughts, let it go. If the person chooses to not to listen, believe that they have good reason to do so. It\u2019s their call. Don\u2019t keep pestering them about it and definitely don\u2019t take matters into your own hands (unless the other person is in actual physical danger, of course.).<\/li>\n<\/ol>\n<p>Offering up criticism is never easy, but if you really care about the person and believe it\u2019s something they need to hear, find a good time and share your thoughts with them. Don\u2019t expect to be the hero at first, but if they are willing to listen and it helps them, that\u2019s all the thanks you need.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>Matthew Sterner is a guest blogger for Musicademy. He blogs at <a href=\"http:\/\/matthewstarner.com\/\">Beyond the Noise: Thoughts on Life and Worship<\/a>.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p><strong>Other posts you might like:<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.musicademy.com\/blog\/developing-character-and-encouraging-your-worship-team\/\">6 ideas for developing character in your worship team and encouraging their work<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.musicademy.com\/blog\/working-with-your-worship-team\/\">6 ideas for working with your worship team outside of Sunday mornings<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.musicademy.com\/blog\/sustainability-the-reasons-we-blow-it\/\">Sustainability \u2013 the reasons we blow it<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.musicademy.com\/blog\/conscious-competence-learning-model\/\">The Conscious Competence Learning Model<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.musicademy.com\/blog\/worship-team-dynamics-the-phases-a-new-team-must-go-through\/\">Worship Team Dynamics \u2013 the phases a new team must go through<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong>Worship Administration \u2013 tips to keep everyone happy<\/strong><\/p>\n<p><strong><a href=\"https:\/\/www.musicademy.com\/blog\/building-and-pastoring-our-worship-teams-notes-from-aaron-keyes-seminar\/\">Building and pastoring our worship teams<\/a><\/strong><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Artists (\u201cArtists\u201d applies to musicians, singers, painters, graphic designers, actors, dancers, etc) in the church receive a tremendous amount of criticism. Musicians especially seem to have a never-ending stream of complainers. I\u2019ve heard everything from \u201cthe music was too loud,\u201d \u201cdon\u2019t use that song again \u2013 I didn\u2019t like it,\u201d and, one of my personal [&hellip;]<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":5303,"featured_media":22134,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":[],"categories":[14,1510],"tags":[],"acf":[],"yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO plugin v20.6 - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>How to Offer Artists Criticism Without Being a Jerk<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Musicians in the church receive a lot of of criticism. 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