(Re)writing a modern hymn

 

We ran a session at a recent training day called “Modern hymns: how are they different? How to (re)write one”.

Here are a few snippets from the session together with some of the new verses composed by our delegates for the hymn “Breathe on me, breath of God”.

4 categories of modern hymn

Modern hymns tend to fall into one of four categories:

1. New arrangement such as David Crowder’s All Creatures of Our God and King
2. Added chorus such as Chris Tomlin’s Amazing Grace (My Chains are Gone)
3. Completely rewritten tune such as Cornerstone (also adds/changes the chorus) and Stuart Townend’s It is Well With My Soul
4. Brand new hymn such as Stuart Townend’s In Christ Alone

How are modern hymns different?

Congregations often love modern hymns. The hymn-like structure suits the “older” clientele who grew up singing Wesley, Watts and Crosby (Fanny Crosby is inexplicably absent from Wikipedia’s list of hymn writers). Features of modern hymns include:

• Theological depth
• Simpler chords
• Added chorus
• Bridge or tag
• Modern language
• Metrical rhythmic structure
• Fewer syncopated rhythms
• Singable melodies

Ideas for re-writing a hymn

One simple way of refreshing a traditional hymn is to add a chorus. Typically a chorus is shorter than the verses and distills the key theme of the hymn into a few lines.

We worked in small groups with the delegates at our training day to add in a new verse or chorus to the hymn “Breath on me, breath of God”. Given that they only had a very short time, the results were most impressive. See below (there’s one tongue-in-cheek funny version in the list too):

Starting hymn

Breathe on me, breath of God,
Fill me with life anew,
That I may love what Thou dost love,
And do what Thou wouldst do.

Breathe on me, breath of God,
Until my heart is pure,
Until with Thee I will one will,
To do and to endure.

Breathe on me, breath of God,
Blend all my soul with Thine,
Until this earthly part of me
Glows with Thy fire divine.

Breathe on me, breath of God,
So shall I never die,
But live with Thee the perfect life
Of Thine eternity.

E.Hatch (1835-1889)

Suggested additions

Chorus and additional verse (Jo Durling):

O guide my ways
And use my hands
Bend my will
Into Your plans

Breathe on me, breath of God
That I may share Your love
So many voices sing this song
And dwell with You above

Additional Verse (anon):

Breathe on me, breath of God
Instill your Spirit’s power
That all I say and seek to do
Is precious to the hour

Additional Verse (anon):

Breathe on me, breath of God
So I can serve you more
And when I go up for prayer
I’ll end up on the floor

Additional Verse (anon):

Breathe on me, breath of God
Journey with me I pray
Through my life’s personal joys and trials
And dwell in me each day

Rap (Rhoda):
Breathe Lord, breathe Lord, breathe on me
Pour out Your Spirit
Pour out You Love
We’ve come to worship
We’ve come to praise
Breathe Lord, breathe Lord, breathe on me

Additional Verse (Julie W):

Breathe on me, breath of God
So I’ll give thanks to You
For all that You have giv’n to me
And all that You still will do

Chorus (anon)

Then hope shall soar and faith shall grow
Then grace abound and mercy flow
And fullness of life shall I know

Chorus and Verse (anon)

Oh guide my ways
And use my heands
Bend my will
Into Your plans

Breathe on me, breath of God
That I may share Your love
So many voices sing this song
And dwell with You above

Chorus (Ian):

Breathe on me, breathe on me
Breathe on me
My Lord and King

Additional Verse (John Nash and Phil Chapman):

Breathe on me, breath of God
Journey with me I pray
Through my life’s personal joys and trials
And dwell in me each day

Additional Verse (anon):

Breathe on me, breath of God
Strengthen my fading heart
That I may go in step with you and
I may do my part

Tag line (John)
For I am yours (slowly)

Additional Verse (Joanna Parsons):

Breathe on me, breath of God
And I will look upon You anew
With peach and grace for you
In all eternity

Additional Verse (Chris Seddon):

Breathe on me, breath of God
Thank you that you are always there
Taking each step with me
And being in Your Care

Chorus (Chris Seddon)
We want to do what You would do
To live and endure
To glow with Your heavenly fire
In Your eternity

Tag line (anon)
To jars of clay
You breathed new life
Your treasure kept

Tag/Chorus (Ayo):

Breathe on me, breath of God
Now my heart is yeild’d You
I give it all up for You

Additional Verse (Gordon Buss):

Breathe on me, breath of God
Carry me to the cross
Where grace and mercy have met in blood
And made my pride my loss

Chorus (Molayo):

Breathe on me
‘Cos I need you and
I can’t live without You
I don’t know how

Chorus/Bridge (Tracey Vacher):

Cleanse me
Revive me
Inspire me
Ignite me

Chorus (Tracey Vacher):

Holy Spirit come and change me
Into the person that You see

Chorus (L Sharp):

Give me the truth to see
That You are in my life today
And life forever more

Chorus (Clare Ross):

Less of me, to bring glory to You
God by glorified
Less of me
Just to bring glory to You

Chorus (Dusty Hoff):

Breath of God breathe on me
And I will never die
With you I have the perfect life
In Your eternity

 

Do you have any of your own to add? Please write them in the comments.

 

And if we missed any of those written on Saturday, please do share them here. Very inspirational.